Feels like time has passed in a blink of an eye! At the same time, it's crazy how much has happened and how much we have grown as a couple in just 5 years! We have had our challenges but we have come through it all stronger while maintaining our sense of humor with the ups and downs of married life. The cliche is true... the challenges we have overcome just cement our faith in our dedication to each other. I know that life can be scary and some obstacles seem impossible but my faith in the proven strength of our love gives me a sense of peace and confidence to battle any future road bump.
D, my love,
On this day 5 years ago, we started our family with a vow to love, honor and cherish through good times and bad. Our love makes the bad not so bad and the good amazingly blissful. Thank you for loving me with such gentleness and patients. Thank you for being such a loving and dedicated father. You gave me your hand in marriage 5 years ago but have given your heart and soul everyday since. I hope you know how deeply honored I am to be your wife, how infinite my love for you is and continues to grow. I look at the life we created and my heart bursts with joy. I can't wait to see what joys the next 5, 10, 25+ years bring and the laughs we will share remembering our journey.
I love you,
XOXOXO,
L
Showing posts with label Family. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Family. Show all posts
Thursday, March 4, 2010
Thursday, December 31, 2009
What a difference a decade makes!
Where were you at the start of this passing decade?
This question was posted on TheBump and OMG... WOW... it just hit me how HUGELY different my life is now! This time 10 years ago, as the 90's were drawing to a close, I was in the hospital recovering from multiple surgeries after a severe spinal chord injury counting my blessings I was alive but depressed seeing the world-wide festivities on TV from my hospital bed... wondering if I could ever find happiness again with disabilities, facing a possible life in a wheel chair and plenty of physical an emotional scars.
The start on 2000 was spent sadly wondering "what now?" My life had been carefully planned out and those plans, my Air Force career as a pilot was no longer possible and the very idea of dating was now something of a sick joke. Who the hell would want this shell of a woman? What will I do if I never get out of this wheel chair?
I sit here crying with joy at how amazing my life is. Now, the start of 2010 draws near and I am healthy, running again and happily married to my best friend who gave me a beautiful daughter... WHAT a difference a few years make [:D]
This question was posted on TheBump and OMG... WOW... it just hit me how HUGELY different my life is now! This time 10 years ago, as the 90's were drawing to a close, I was in the hospital recovering from multiple surgeries after a severe spinal chord injury counting my blessings I was alive but depressed seeing the world-wide festivities on TV from my hospital bed... wondering if I could ever find happiness again with disabilities, facing a possible life in a wheel chair and plenty of physical an emotional scars.
The start on 2000 was spent sadly wondering "what now?" My life had been carefully planned out and those plans, my Air Force career as a pilot was no longer possible and the very idea of dating was now something of a sick joke. Who the hell would want this shell of a woman? What will I do if I never get out of this wheel chair?
I sit here crying with joy at how amazing my life is. Now, the start of 2010 draws near and I am healthy, running again and happily married to my best friend who gave me a beautiful daughter... WHAT a difference a few years make [:D]
Friday, October 9, 2009
Ariana's Birth Story
After my OB checkup Monday afternoon, I continues to have cramps and then realized they were contractions. They didn't let up even as I walked around Target and went to Kohl's for some last minute Fall decor shopping. They also kept coming every 15-20 minutes which made me realize they were actual contractions! Got some stuff for dinner and by the time hubby got home from work around 7pm, the contractions were almost 10 minutes apart. Used the contraction master to time them which was cool.
Knowing we had to go to the hospital around 6am to be induced, we double checked to make sure all the bags were packed and went to bed around 10pm. The contractions were getting stronger and felt like someone was pushing my lower tummy up against the edge of the counter and pulling my abs down towards my feet... it was different then I thought contractions would feel like. Didn't have back pain... just a little achie which made laying in bed very uncomfortable! There was NO sleeping to be had for me! Hubby got a few hours of sleep in (guys always get over! LOL!). I kept watching the clock timing the contractions... at about 2 AM, they were now just about 5 minutes apart and getting very uncomfortable/painful. I got up to pee and a huge blood clot plopped in the toilet and my pad was soaked like I was having a heavy period. I freaked at the amount of blood so I called Labor & Delivery to see if I should come in earlier then expected. Got the green light! My hair was still wet from showering before bed so I just grabbed a big bowl of cereal & fruit and put out a huge bowl of food & water for the dog and off to the hospital we went!
After being checked at the hospital, I was now 3 cm dilated! They admitted me since I was well enough along and I was already scheduled to be induced a couple hours later. The contractions got stronger from feeling like my lower tummy was being jammed hard against a counter top to feeling like I was being stabbed where my lower tummy meets my pubic bone in combo with my abs being pulled down towards my feet. I was achie in my lower back but it wasn't sharp back pain labor. I could not get comfortable laying down on either side or back. Standing was not much better but because they would let me wear underwear, I didn't want to walk around and be dripping clops of bloody discharge (TMI!). Damen was getting frustrated with me because HE wanted to walk around and do the laboring positions & messages and stuff we learned during our child birth class. I love him for being excited to use all that he's learned BUT it not about what he wanted to do but what felt best for me at the time... he wasn't liking that I didn't want to do them and opted to sit or lay in bed. I was also getting a little annoyed when he would get distracted trying to play music on the laptop with a slide show of our pics... it wasn't playing right and after a few minutes I just wanted him to forget it and concentrate on helping me with my pain. I was getting VERY testie and he was getting irritated with my snappy attitude but DUDE, I AM BIRTHING A BABY DAMN IT! if any time I had a free pass to be bitchy, that was it LOL!
Hours passed and at about 9am I was almost 5 cm dilated and the contractions were between 3-2 minutes apart and so intense. They were offering IV drugs (narcotics) to take the edge of the pain but I didn't want to be sleep and loopy during the birth and IV drugs are shared with the baby which was not something we wanted. I have been told by many that narcotics make you groggy but you still feel all the pain... so why do it? The breathing helped get through contractions but it was so intense! If I had to, I felt I could continue without and pain medication but I was tired and was scared that they may come a point of no return for an epidural, so I gave in and requested one. About 9:45 am I got my Epi and OHHHH the sweet relief! I cried when they were putting in the needle not because of the pain... it didn't hurt at all to put in the epi... I was emotional over the pressure of going all natural and the possible risks (all be it they are low) of getting an epi. Ever since my accident 10 years ago, medical risks are HUGE worries for me and weigh on me heavily. But I said to myself, why torture yourself for hours when I could rest up for the hard part of pushing?!? I respect other women who chose to go all natural but there is no other way I would rather labor! After the epi, I was able to laugh and enjoy the build up to getting to finally hold my baby. We watched episode after episode of Friends on my laptop, listed to the CD we made of songs dedicated to Cornbread, I was able to shut my eyes bits here and there and rest up, snacked on some fruit cups and get ready for the hard part of pushing.
We got in trouble when we got caught eating snacks. The nurse said after getting the epi I was only allowed ice chips but we snuck some nibbles here and there when she was out of the room. I am about to push like I have never labored before and hadn't had anything to eat since the day before and no sleep wither... I will have my crackers and fruit cups damn it! We were taught in our labor class to sneak them in to keep out energy up and thank goodness for that cause I SOOOOO needed that energy when it was time to push!!!
I was shaking so much from the hormones of labor and the epi. I wasn't really cold but I was shaking like I was naked in a blizzard. The last couple of hours, I noticed my jaw hurt from my teeth chattering for hours. Damen kept playing with the thermostat to help me warm up then cool down when I got the sweats. He was worried but I told him it looks worse than it really felt.
I started to feel some pressure when she started to descend down the birth canal. It felt like a cantaloupe between my legs... so that was her head moving down. There were some scary moments when her heart beat would drop bellow 60 bpm and the nurse came running in to put my on a different side and an oxygen mask on. After taking deep breaths with the added oxygen for a few minutes, her heart beat came back up to 130-140 bpm. I was so worried and cried a bit just praying our baby stayed safe. Damen was great keeping me calm. If he was worried, he didn't show it. They said the heart beat slowed when I contracted and was on one side for too long either cause the chord was around her neck or she was pressed up against the chord during contractions.
They turned down the epi toward the end when I was about 9.5 cm dilated so I could feel the pressure to push but still have some pain relief. The nurse said my epi bag was almost out but she didn't want to put another one in since I would be done in 15- 20 minutes (LOL and was she wrong... to my dismay!). At 10 cm, they then told me to lay on my back and bring my knees up and to my chest to push. Being on my back made the baby's heart beat drop so I had to push lying on my right side with Damen helping to hold up my left leg. About an hour of hard pushing, she was crowning and the epi had worn off so i felt the tare that was happening... FUN FUN! My Dr was then called to get his ass in the room and tru to form, he was running late. He said he was 15 minute away... the nurse relplied that I didn't have 15 minutes and then my Dr said, "too bad, she'll have to wait."
FUCK NO is what i said... I have to push!
Damen was super pissed when he heard the doctor's reply to the nurse! So I pushed and a couple of pushes later, Ariana Cherie was born at 4:14pm on October 6, 2009. She was 7 lbs. 2 oz. and 19.5 inches long with a healthy set of lungs. The minutes after she was born happened so fast and was so surreal... here was this little thing that been kicking and growing inside me for months... she was a stranger but kinda wasn't. After a few minutes on my tummy, they whisked her away to clean her up and weighed her. We realized afterward, they didn't ask Damen to cut the chord which sucks but whatever. The nurses then pushed on my tummy to get the blood out and the placenta (which I asked to look at cause I am cool like that!). The pushing on my belly hurt like hell... followed by more pain from a few stitches down bellow where I had a 1st degree tare.
She was soon back on my chest for some skin to skin time and we had our first attempt to breast feed. Those moments were such a blur. I am glad that initial bonding time was caught on camera cause I really cant remember too much detail myself. I couldn't believe this little miricle was in my arms. I tried to soak in as much of her as I could... she had my hair, not a bit of curl from Damen, Damen's nose, my lip pout... she was precious. And now the overwhelming part of being first time parents begins!
We stayed 2 days in the hospital although they said we could leave after one day, we opted to stay and get as much help as possible easing into parenthood. Birthing was a messy ordeal... I wont go into detail about all the blood but just to say it was messy! Those first few days, I hurt EVERYWHERE! All my muscles must have been used during the pushing cause I hurt worse than any after workout soreness ever!
Ariana and I took to breast feeding like pros (thankfully!). She had no problem latching. It was funny and strange seeing my boobs serving an actual purpose. Damen was jealous of our bonding time and asked for some skin to skin with her but instead of sleeping on his chest, she was trying to clamp onto his nips which was hilarious!!!
I looked a mess but we were so happy and still in shock we were now parents. But we laugh through most of the fear and stress so I think we'll journey down this new path just fine.
Knowing we had to go to the hospital around 6am to be induced, we double checked to make sure all the bags were packed and went to bed around 10pm. The contractions were getting stronger and felt like someone was pushing my lower tummy up against the edge of the counter and pulling my abs down towards my feet... it was different then I thought contractions would feel like. Didn't have back pain... just a little achie which made laying in bed very uncomfortable! There was NO sleeping to be had for me! Hubby got a few hours of sleep in (guys always get over! LOL!). I kept watching the clock timing the contractions... at about 2 AM, they were now just about 5 minutes apart and getting very uncomfortable/painful. I got up to pee and a huge blood clot plopped in the toilet and my pad was soaked like I was having a heavy period. I freaked at the amount of blood so I called Labor & Delivery to see if I should come in earlier then expected. Got the green light! My hair was still wet from showering before bed so I just grabbed a big bowl of cereal & fruit and put out a huge bowl of food & water for the dog and off to the hospital we went!
After being checked at the hospital, I was now 3 cm dilated! They admitted me since I was well enough along and I was already scheduled to be induced a couple hours later. The contractions got stronger from feeling like my lower tummy was being jammed hard against a counter top to feeling like I was being stabbed where my lower tummy meets my pubic bone in combo with my abs being pulled down towards my feet. I was achie in my lower back but it wasn't sharp back pain labor. I could not get comfortable laying down on either side or back. Standing was not much better but because they would let me wear underwear, I didn't want to walk around and be dripping clops of bloody discharge (TMI!). Damen was getting frustrated with me because HE wanted to walk around and do the laboring positions & messages and stuff we learned during our child birth class. I love him for being excited to use all that he's learned BUT it not about what he wanted to do but what felt best for me at the time... he wasn't liking that I didn't want to do them and opted to sit or lay in bed. I was also getting a little annoyed when he would get distracted trying to play music on the laptop with a slide show of our pics... it wasn't playing right and after a few minutes I just wanted him to forget it and concentrate on helping me with my pain. I was getting VERY testie and he was getting irritated with my snappy attitude but DUDE, I AM BIRTHING A BABY DAMN IT! if any time I had a free pass to be bitchy, that was it LOL!
Hours passed and at about 9am I was almost 5 cm dilated and the contractions were between 3-2 minutes apart and so intense. They were offering IV drugs (narcotics) to take the edge of the pain but I didn't want to be sleep and loopy during the birth and IV drugs are shared with the baby which was not something we wanted. I have been told by many that narcotics make you groggy but you still feel all the pain... so why do it? The breathing helped get through contractions but it was so intense! If I had to, I felt I could continue without and pain medication but I was tired and was scared that they may come a point of no return for an epidural, so I gave in and requested one. About 9:45 am I got my Epi and OHHHH the sweet relief! I cried when they were putting in the needle not because of the pain... it didn't hurt at all to put in the epi... I was emotional over the pressure of going all natural and the possible risks (all be it they are low) of getting an epi. Ever since my accident 10 years ago, medical risks are HUGE worries for me and weigh on me heavily. But I said to myself, why torture yourself for hours when I could rest up for the hard part of pushing?!? I respect other women who chose to go all natural but there is no other way I would rather labor! After the epi, I was able to laugh and enjoy the build up to getting to finally hold my baby. We watched episode after episode of Friends on my laptop, listed to the CD we made of songs dedicated to Cornbread, I was able to shut my eyes bits here and there and rest up, snacked on some fruit cups and get ready for the hard part of pushing.
We got in trouble when we got caught eating snacks. The nurse said after getting the epi I was only allowed ice chips but we snuck some nibbles here and there when she was out of the room. I am about to push like I have never labored before and hadn't had anything to eat since the day before and no sleep wither... I will have my crackers and fruit cups damn it! We were taught in our labor class to sneak them in to keep out energy up and thank goodness for that cause I SOOOOO needed that energy when it was time to push!!!
I was shaking so much from the hormones of labor and the epi. I wasn't really cold but I was shaking like I was naked in a blizzard. The last couple of hours, I noticed my jaw hurt from my teeth chattering for hours. Damen kept playing with the thermostat to help me warm up then cool down when I got the sweats. He was worried but I told him it looks worse than it really felt.
I started to feel some pressure when she started to descend down the birth canal. It felt like a cantaloupe between my legs... so that was her head moving down. There were some scary moments when her heart beat would drop bellow 60 bpm and the nurse came running in to put my on a different side and an oxygen mask on. After taking deep breaths with the added oxygen for a few minutes, her heart beat came back up to 130-140 bpm. I was so worried and cried a bit just praying our baby stayed safe. Damen was great keeping me calm. If he was worried, he didn't show it. They said the heart beat slowed when I contracted and was on one side for too long either cause the chord was around her neck or she was pressed up against the chord during contractions.
They turned down the epi toward the end when I was about 9.5 cm dilated so I could feel the pressure to push but still have some pain relief. The nurse said my epi bag was almost out but she didn't want to put another one in since I would be done in 15- 20 minutes (LOL and was she wrong... to my dismay!). At 10 cm, they then told me to lay on my back and bring my knees up and to my chest to push. Being on my back made the baby's heart beat drop so I had to push lying on my right side with Damen helping to hold up my left leg. About an hour of hard pushing, she was crowning and the epi had worn off so i felt the tare that was happening... FUN FUN! My Dr was then called to get his ass in the room and tru to form, he was running late. He said he was 15 minute away... the nurse relplied that I didn't have 15 minutes and then my Dr said, "too bad, she'll have to wait."
FUCK NO is what i said... I have to push!
- My EPI wore off and this hurts like a biotch! It hurt more not to push than to push and feel it taring down there.
- My babies heart rate kept dropping with the contractions so I am not keeping her trapped in my vadge for an extra 15 minutes!
- Did I mention I was in pain like nothing I have ever felt before?
Damen was super pissed when he heard the doctor's reply to the nurse! So I pushed and a couple of pushes later, Ariana Cherie was born at 4:14pm on October 6, 2009. She was 7 lbs. 2 oz. and 19.5 inches long with a healthy set of lungs. The minutes after she was born happened so fast and was so surreal... here was this little thing that been kicking and growing inside me for months... she was a stranger but kinda wasn't. After a few minutes on my tummy, they whisked her away to clean her up and weighed her. We realized afterward, they didn't ask Damen to cut the chord which sucks but whatever. The nurses then pushed on my tummy to get the blood out and the placenta (which I asked to look at cause I am cool like that!). The pushing on my belly hurt like hell... followed by more pain from a few stitches down bellow where I had a 1st degree tare.
She was soon back on my chest for some skin to skin time and we had our first attempt to breast feed. Those moments were such a blur. I am glad that initial bonding time was caught on camera cause I really cant remember too much detail myself. I couldn't believe this little miricle was in my arms. I tried to soak in as much of her as I could... she had my hair, not a bit of curl from Damen, Damen's nose, my lip pout... she was precious. And now the overwhelming part of being first time parents begins!
We stayed 2 days in the hospital although they said we could leave after one day, we opted to stay and get as much help as possible easing into parenthood. Birthing was a messy ordeal... I wont go into detail about all the blood but just to say it was messy! Those first few days, I hurt EVERYWHERE! All my muscles must have been used during the pushing cause I hurt worse than any after workout soreness ever!
Ariana and I took to breast feeding like pros (thankfully!). She had no problem latching. It was funny and strange seeing my boobs serving an actual purpose. Damen was jealous of our bonding time and asked for some skin to skin with her but instead of sleeping on his chest, she was trying to clamp onto his nips which was hilarious!!!
I looked a mess but we were so happy and still in shock we were now parents. But we laugh through most of the fear and stress so I think we'll journey down this new path just fine.
Friday, September 25, 2009
*sigh* ...this waiting game sucks!
So bored waiting around for this baby to come out! Damen has requested I don't go window shopping anymore cause he's worried I may go into labor while out and about... but I am sooooo bored! Its too hot to walk outside so I would rather walk around the stores! He also went from last week telling Cornbread to stay in there for a little longer to now wanting to try all the old wives tale to induce labor! He said starting tomorrow it will be daily rituals of spicy food, walks, and nookie LOL! I laughed at the last bit because the thought of sex and the huge belly is too damn comical for words! My response was "good luck with that!"
My due date is Sunday the 27th. My guess is nothing will happen until October 1st. I am just hoping something happens before the doc has to induce. Induction increases the chance of needing a C-section and that's one I want to avoid most because of the added recovery time.
Dear Cornbread,
It has been a fun, crazy and surreal experience being your room and board for the past 9+ months. I have loved each new experience from the first sonogram to the first moment I felt you move inside and the first time your Daddy felt your ninja kicks. Those precious first will be treasured forever. The poking games you and Daddy play at my expense were fun when you were smaller but now its just too uncomfortable. You need to come on out to play now! We are all anxious to meet you and smother you with hugs and smooches and to nibble on those chipmunk cheeks of yours!
You have a lot of love waiting for you out here so hurry up little one! Of course... only if you're ready for a safe arrival... we love you sweetie!
See you soon!
Love,
~ Mom & Dad
My due date is Sunday the 27th. My guess is nothing will happen until October 1st. I am just hoping something happens before the doc has to induce. Induction increases the chance of needing a C-section and that's one I want to avoid most because of the added recovery time.
Dear Cornbread,
It has been a fun, crazy and surreal experience being your room and board for the past 9+ months. I have loved each new experience from the first sonogram to the first moment I felt you move inside and the first time your Daddy felt your ninja kicks. Those precious first will be treasured forever. The poking games you and Daddy play at my expense were fun when you were smaller but now its just too uncomfortable. You need to come on out to play now! We are all anxious to meet you and smother you with hugs and smooches and to nibble on those chipmunk cheeks of yours!
You have a lot of love waiting for you out here so hurry up little one! Of course... only if you're ready for a safe arrival... we love you sweetie!
See you soon!
Love,
~ Mom & Dad
Sunday, September 13, 2009
2 Weeks to go! (Hopefully!)
A little less than 2 weeks until my due date! And OMG I am ready to evict her from my uterus! I am so unbelievable uncomfortable! My lower back is killing me, cannot sleep more than 3 hours each night because of the pain and discomfort and having to get up to pee in the night... being a light sleeper makes getting back to sleep impossible! Getting in & out of bed and turning from one side to another is the WORST part of my days! These maneuvers cause such groin pain... my crotch ligaments feel like they are being torn apart as if my legs are being used in a tug of war fight.
I feel bad for Damen because he has been stuck with the brunt of the house work and he is already working such long hours. His weekends are spent vacuuming and washing the floors and the office work he takes home with him. I just hope I don't get a Cesarean because that will put the work load on him for a little longer after the baby is born. I want to be as mobile as possible after the baby is born.
Other than that, we are just waiting. Damen had a crash course last weekend in baby care and changing diapers using a teddy bear... it was so fun seeing try to get it down knowing it'll be a ton more different with a squirming crying little one LOL! He is gonna be a great father... my heart swells thinking how blessed I am to have him as the father of my child. She will be so loved and protected... and have the strong warm loving security of a father who would always be there for her... all the things I never had from a father figure... it fills me with so much joy seeing the love and excitement in Damen's eyes. I love him deeper everyday.
I feel bad for Damen because he has been stuck with the brunt of the house work and he is already working such long hours. His weekends are spent vacuuming and washing the floors and the office work he takes home with him. I just hope I don't get a Cesarean because that will put the work load on him for a little longer after the baby is born. I want to be as mobile as possible after the baby is born.
Other than that, we are just waiting. Damen had a crash course last weekend in baby care and changing diapers using a teddy bear... it was so fun seeing try to get it down knowing it'll be a ton more different with a squirming crying little one LOL! He is gonna be a great father... my heart swells thinking how blessed I am to have him as the father of my child. She will be so loved and protected... and have the strong warm loving security of a father who would always be there for her... all the things I never had from a father figure... it fills me with so much joy seeing the love and excitement in Damen's eyes. I love him deeper everyday.
Saturday, June 27, 2009
27 Weeks... almost done with 2nd Trimester!
The first Tri dragged on so slow but all of a sudden we find ourselves in the home stretch and entering the 3 trimester after this week! Cornbread has a REAL name now but we are not announcing it until her birth. The poor girl will be called Cornbread by Damen and I as a nickname for the rest of her life though, hehehe! She is still kicking strong and her most active is late afternoon and 2-3:00am where it feels like she is following a Tae-Bo workout in there! Damen is away TDY for a week and will be back the day before we have to leave for a wedding in Denver for the 4th of July weekend. This will be interesting flying and being pregnant! I normally dehydrate myself cause I hate the cramped nasty bathrooms on the plane but I have to drink plenty of water in my condition so I am soooo not gonna like this! That small bathroom is gonna suck even more with a belly in my way!
On a not so happy note, we are dealing with some family drama a-g-a-i-n and true to form, my MIL feels like making demands and being selfish and belligerent to get her way on something so ridiculous rather than being understanding towards our needs at the time of the birth. Her inability to see past her own selfish emotions and her verbal attacks on Damen and me when she is angry for not getting her way is beyond immature, inappropriate and abhorrent... borderline emotionally abusive! She even sank to a new low by calling my mom with ulterior motives of getting info from her to use against us and see if she can get her angry at us too! She is out of line and there is no justification for her behavior.
Being a active presence in the family we are building is a privilege NOT a right and with that privilege comes responsibilities. It requires being respectfully of our decisions and respecting our boundaries as parents and as husband and wife. You violate that basic requirement and your are not welcome in our home. If you see this as unfair or uncaring, seek some counseling because you have a warped sense of what a loving relationship should look like.
I am sad for Damen. He has to deal with the brunt of her verbal venom because he is protecting me from the added stress and emotional strain. This was not how he pictured things to play out when he envisioned have kids. It's heartbreaking.
AT 27 WEEKS PREGNANT:
This week, your baby weighs almost 2 pounds (like a head of cauliflower) and is about 14 1/2 inches long with her legs extended. She's sleeping and waking at regular intervals, opening and closing her eyes, and perhaps even sucking her fingers. With more brain tissue developing, your baby's brain is very active now. While her lungs are still immature, they would be capable of functioning — with a lot of medical help — if she were to be born now. Chalk up any tiny rhythmic movements you may be feeling to a case of baby hiccups, which may be common from now on. Each episode usually lasts only a few moments, and they don't bother her, so just relax and enjoy the tickle.
On a not so happy note, we are dealing with some family drama a-g-a-i-n and true to form, my MIL feels like making demands and being selfish and belligerent to get her way on something so ridiculous rather than being understanding towards our needs at the time of the birth. Her inability to see past her own selfish emotions and her verbal attacks on Damen and me when she is angry for not getting her way is beyond immature, inappropriate and abhorrent... borderline emotionally abusive! She even sank to a new low by calling my mom with ulterior motives of getting info from her to use against us and see if she can get her angry at us too! She is out of line and there is no justification for her behavior.
Being a active presence in the family we are building is a privilege NOT a right and with that privilege comes responsibilities. It requires being respectfully of our decisions and respecting our boundaries as parents and as husband and wife. You violate that basic requirement and your are not welcome in our home. If you see this as unfair or uncaring, seek some counseling because you have a warped sense of what a loving relationship should look like.
I am sad for Damen. He has to deal with the brunt of her verbal venom because he is protecting me from the added stress and emotional strain. This was not how he pictured things to play out when he envisioned have kids. It's heartbreaking.
Thursday, March 19, 2009
First baby pics!!!
I haven't been able to keep up with blogging between work and extreme exhaustion... but here are the 12 week updates:
We had our first sonogram last Tues and are waiting for the results from the first trimester screening... but so far everything looks to be normal (thank God!). Here are Cornbread's first baby pics!
He/she was measuring 12 weeks & 2 days as of 3/17... 3 more days than my charting calculations but maybe Cornbread's just a fast grower ;o)
It was so amazing seeing him/her move the little arms and legs as the technician moved the sonogram probe to get the right angle for measuring the little's growth progress. It’s so crazy surreal to think this little life is living and growing inside of me! I think it has finally sunk in for D... he's gotten all protective and super gooberlishly mushy lately (hehehe). We have sent out announcement to everyone... so it's official... we are going to be parents! OMG!
It makes it more real with visible proof of the miracle growing inside (besides the constipation, mild aches and nausea). In about 4 more weeks I will start to be able to feel the little one move! I am in awww of the life we are creating!
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